awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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