Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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