if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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