her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
