the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
