I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
