i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize