I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I want her autograph on my taint
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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