i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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