It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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