You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
