we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Randomize