HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
God I need to hump something, right now.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
