Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
