the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize
