Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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