I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
