I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
This toilet bowl is my home.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
