if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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