who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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