i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
