i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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