dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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