He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I need a beard to bite.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
