There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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