I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
