who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
