Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
My life is pants optional.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
