So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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