I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
