He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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