mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
3pm strippers are depressing
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
