; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
