question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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