It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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