oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
