I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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