giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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