Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
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