wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
