I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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