god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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