i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
