I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
