i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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