Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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