I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
