All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Randomize
