I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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