Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
